What I Heard at the Men’s Retreat

Flying out on Valentines day was not the best way to leave my wife with two kids.  It was she who paid the highest price for my rest and renewal, even when compared to the financial cost shouldered by our supporters. Even though kids were sick and she was tired she blessed me in faith that it would be worth it. As soon as I landed in Nairobi the glimmer of dividends began to show in unexpected ways.  In my experience, traveling in Africa requires a small amount of faith and a large amount of divine intervention to get you where you are going.  So, as landed in Nairobi and boarded the airport bus that would take me to arrivals baggage claim I was not too surprised to hear a voice say, “Caleb?” behind me.  I turned to see two Missionary friends who were also attending the men’s retreat. It turned out that they too were staying at the hotel I had been booked at and already had a taxi ready that I could join them in! After over three hours of traffic we finally made it to our guest house. In addition to the increased safety (three are less likely to be jumped in Nairobi traffic than one) I was blessed by the conversations we had while sandwiched between packed to bulging buses, smoke-spewing transport trucks, and luxurious Landcruisers. At risk of broadcasting quotes out of context, I have listed a few nuggets of truth and thoughts from that time that have continued to shape how I think and act.

“A man is someone who rejects passivity, accepts responsibility, leads courageously, and expects the greater reward.” – quoted from Raising a Modern Day Knight

“There are no holidays or weekends in our job. It’s just a way of life.”

“You can not serve something you do not love.”

“‘But seek the shalom of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the LORD on its behalf, for in its shalom you will find your shalom.’ (Jer. 29:7) …Don’t just invest in the relationships in your ministry but become invested in the peaceful-welfare, the shalom, of the neighborhood, the city, you are in and pray to the LORD on its behalf. For in its shalom you will find your shalom.”

The following day a group of us met with our Kenyan brothers and leaders in the church to learn from them what God is teaching them about disciple making movements. A number of the quotes from those conversations have stuck with me and now shape how I think about our work and life here.

“Prayer movements proceed disciple making movements.”

“We need to have an attitude of, ‘Let’s walk along together for the Kingdom of God,’ versus, ‘Who benefits from who?'”

“Once a thing is owned it is sustainable.”

“We must listen well so that we can respond well.”

“Discipleship is not focused on conversion but rather is a process into conversion.”

“Islam is the best religion… but I came to Christ not to find religion.”

“Jesus was not interested in religion. He came to start a salvation movement.”

“The world is giving up on Christianity not Christ.”

“Understanding your rolls is very important for a disciple maker. You make a huge impact whatever you do!”

“If you do not obey how can you expect to make disciples who obey?”

With my mind full of these thoughts and many more I headed to the retreat feeling that the trip had already been worth it. Of course the information and thoughts just kept coming like water from a fire hose.  There was no hope to retain in quote form all of what was discussed at the retreat over a total of six talk sessions followed by six discussion times interspersed with six tea times and nine meal times and lots of random and planned conversations in between! There were a few quotes, however, that have really stuck with me concerning prayer that I can share with you here.

“Ask God to make you burdened by what he is burdened by concerning the people you serve.”

“A burden and desperation will drive you to prayer.”

“Righteousness affects the effectiveness of prayer. Can I choose a selfish act that compromises my righteousness when I have a burden to pray?”

On the last day of the retreat one brother shared a concept that was life changing for me and I know will bless my ministry and life if I take it to heart.  He showed us a version of the image I have placed below and explained that this “Cycle of Grace” starts with acceptance of your identity in Christ; specifically as Beloved of God.

(Image from http://www.vineyardlife.co.za/downloads/image/images/gracecycle1.jpg)

The second input in the cycle is represented by the word Sustenance and is comprised of what you would normally think of as the spiritual disciplines (reading the Bible, praying, etc.) and fellowship with other believers.  The third word represents the idea that as these inputs affect everything you do in a way that gives them significance. Your actions and thoughts, are shaped by the Spirit as they grow out of an acceptance of your identity in Christ and the sustenance received from the Spirit who is a spring of living water within you . The fourth and final step is fruitfulness. Fruit is what we are all interested in and want to know how to get to. In this picture fruit is the natural outcome of significance born out of sustenance which is received on the basis of acceptance of your identity as Beloved. The bad news is most of us are working this cycle backwards!  We work for fruitfulness so that we will be significant, believing significance would sustain us and allow us to secure acceptance as a Beloved of God. It is such a relief to now this truth and to be free to pursue knowing my identity as an accepted Beloved of God and invest in sustenance knowing that they will produce significance and fruitfulness in my life and work. When I heard this it reminded me of something another brother had said earlier in the week.

“It is important to know our identity in Christ. My wife and I have been studying about our identity and now every night before we go to sleep we tell each other, ‘You are blessed.’ You should start studying about your identity… Ephesians is a good place to start…. I want you to have a list of at least ten truths about who you are in Christ by next Men’s retreat… There are something like three hundred!”

Needless to say, I came home with lots in my head and heart.  These are just a few of the big picture concepts. There were many other specific and practical insights that I gained as well.  I want to thank all of our supporters who helped financially and who have been praying for us.  And I especially thank Kristina who held down the fort at home and expected the greater reward. We have started reminding each other that we are blessed every night. And you should too.

“You are blessed.”

“You are Beloved of God.”

~ by Caleb on February 26, 2014.